Wind Horse

The scene changed completely with the realisation that I was outside the mountain in broad daylight, looking down on what appeared to be a white hand basin full of water. The guide was by my left side and I was able to look directly at his face. I felt fear rising and he told me not to be afraid.

It was with even more awe that I realized by a shift of perspective the ‘basin’ was in fact a vast lake surrounded by white mountains. It shifted back and forth I looked to and from the guide, who by turns appeared to be a giant holding out his arms, cradling the lake and mountains; but at the same time he looked just like an ordinary – sized man.

If I looked at him like an ordinary-sized man the valley looked like the white basin, but if I focused on the lake I saw it in perspective, as a huge, sweeping vista.

Not long after this the guide and I were two regular-sized people standing on a flat plain in the weak sunshine penetrating the icy air. It occurred to me that the guide had showed me some the secrets of the elements and that now we were to focus on the wind. This was, after, the way I’d ‘arrived’.

Recalling the appearance of the eagle I noted that it had been exactly like wind/cloud, white and translucent. My guide performed tricks with the wind and I asked – rather hopefully – if I might see the wind horses I’d heard so much about.

Almost ridiculously quickly, a beautifully elaborate white wind horse with wings outspread appeared in the middle distance of the sky and walked around in front of us. I was disturbed, however, to find it was pulling a type of chariot and whilst the horse itself seemed not to mind this hindrance, I ardently prayed for it to be released from the yoke it was under.

After a surprisingly long time – the chariot stubbornly remained – the horse casually walked free and up into the air, where it strolled gently away on the light breeze. I saw several white wind horses on the plain then, most with opened wings.

It occurred to me that perhaps I was meant to board the chariot and I wondered why this logical notion had not occurred to me at the time. My guide looked rather disappointed in me so I assumed I failed that particular test in some way.

The vision faded shortly after all of this and I fell asleep.

Meeting of Saints and Angels

We quickly passed through the entrance and hallway of the mountain, which seemed to be well enough lit but we were moving so fast that I had no time to look out for any kind of décor or other details. However, it was clear even from fleeting glimpses that the interior of this place was awesome in the true sense of this word, appearing to be of huge proportions for one thing.

Although it was ‘natural’ – ie, of the mountain – it looked as if it had been hewn out by hand and was clearly magnificent. There were various colours on the walls, presumably from paintings.

The further into the mountain we went, the darker it became and, though we still moved very swiftly indeed, I was increasingly struck by the totally unique surroundings I’d found myself in. This helped to assuage the mounting unease I felt, because it was evident that an occasion of some import was taking place therein.

I noticed that the further we went inside, the more people there seemed to be, until we stopped at an immense cavern that was so large it did not even appear to be deep underground. There was a sombre and powerfully sanctified air.

I must have been asking questions because I was told numerous times by my guide that an assembly meeting of the saints with the angels was taking place. One can scarcely imagine this spectacle.

Filling the cavern/hall, forming a winding line hundreds strong that moved up the passage/path running around and through it, were people dressed identically who I assumed to be the Saints. Each was dressed in classic ‘hermit’ garb in dark sackcloth-type, belted, hooded robes and holding up a lantern in one hand. All had their backs to me and I saw none of their faces.

Although I was specifically told the angels were present (maybe further up towards the front of the line?) I do not recall seeing any, being totally absorbed in the sight of all these saints/hermits. The sight of the hermits’ lamps lighting the way prevented any further fear from entering my mind.

It was an awesome sight. I am not sure what the subject of the meeting was but I ascertained that those standing in line were waitig to meet some hugely powerful figure who was located out of sight at the apex of the stairs.

Doorway in the Mountain

At a certain point in time – quite a long while later, it seemed – the size and volatile nature of the fire subsided until it was about the same height as me. It turned into a crown-shaped, three-tongued flame that I saw as Shin. I sat inside it, relaxing a little.

It was an interesting exercise and I spent a long time practicingsitting within the circling flames and watching the fiery heads of the tongues flickering. The tongues kept making a circle and I tried to ‘straighten them out’ into the usual Shin shape.

Eventually the fire/snow and then fire operation came to an end and I saw that dawn was breaking. It had come upon me unawares. The tribesmen indicated for me to follow them and began moving away from the fire.

There seemed to be quite a lot of men around by then and I noted that I’d been right in my assessment of their clothing: leather trousers and boots, woven woolen jerkins and hats, belts, practical but colourful clothes. The mood was still rather serious.

I was told to fall in line as we approached a triangular mountain, at the base of which I saw there was an entrance. More than just an opening or crevice, this resembled a large door. It was quite astonishing to see and I faltered for a moment. Did I really want to go in (I’d decided against going into mountains or caves prior to this experience) and would I get out again if I did?

I was told by my guide – a serious man of few words – to not be afraid.

Circle of Shamans

I felt extremely alert, nervous in fact.

Up in the sky with the eagle all had been blue day, but here on the ground I could see it was black night and that the fire was only light visible in this entire place. I could just make out a number of men – between 5 and 9 – seated around the fire watching me intently. I took them to be tribesmen/shamans, largely because of their appearance. They seemed to be of Asian stock and were wearing woolen hats covering their ears woven of multi coloured threads.

They seemed to be dressed in a combination of wool and leather and were very watchful without seeming aggressive.

They spoke to and interacted with me (I couldn’t hear anything, I just sensed it) but seemed really quite cautious. They were not hostile but they did not smile. I experienced some doubt around this point and was suddenly aware that I’d been told not to ‘play with fire’ (bearing in mind I was pretty much standing in one) and warned especially against salamanders.

I hopped out of the fire and retreated very quickly to the edge of the camp, which I circled quite restlessly for a while. Worryingly, there was nowhere to go, the darkness was impenetrable beyond their circle and I have always been afraid of the dark.

I sat out there on the edge, on my own, for quite some time, but eventually the lack of light and concern for what might have been ‘out there’ drew me closer to the group around the fire again. It seemed there was no escape.

At that point, one of the shamans presented himself as a guide, possibly reluctantly; I’m not sure if being female helped me in this respect. Nevertheless, I was told to relax and not to fear the darkness or the situation. I had little choice but to acquiesce, this being their territory after all.

Very peculiar things then started to happen.

The camp-fire was mesmerising and I found myself continually insisting on getting into it, as if hypnotised or entranced. After indeterminate lengths of time in the fire I would then worry (quite irrationally, I suspect) about salamanders, whereupon I would somehow ‘whizz’ out of the fire at breakneck speed and jump straight into the mounds of soft snow surrounding us, as if to convince myself that I wasn’t burning up.

I did this several times at explosive speed for no reason whatsoever that I can discern. I’ve no idea ‘what’ I was doing or even what I ‘was’. The movement between fire and snow was incredibly forceful and I was totally absorbed in the elemental procedure.

At a certain point I stood looking up from the centre of the orange flame which seemed to encompass everything, and wondered whether – if the eagle had indeed been shot down – I might see a phoenix. The next time I leapt out I managed to ‘cocoon’ myself entirely in fiery/watery, spinning light.

Is this how a star is made, I wondered?

The Camp Fire

At a certain point in this lengthy journey I wondered if I ought to look out for something more specific, as it seemed that we we were actually going somewhere. No sooner did I think this when the bird dropped lower and my own eyes were able to see more clearly the landscape below. We reached a place that looked like a space between mountains, a kind of valley, and I began to wonder if anyone was down there.

Maybe we would see a fire?

I saw the fire very soon after thinking of it, though I also experienced a moment’s hesitation that I believe was felt by the bird as well.

Were the makers of the fire friendly?

Until that moment it had been circling a particular area, but suddenly it dipped downwards so quickly that it left me suspended in mid air for a second.

After slight deliberation, it was somehow decided that it would be alright to ‘go down’ for a closer look at the campfire we had just spotted. Just as I was wondering how long it would take to get there, I arrived with an almighty crash right on top of self same fire.

It all seemed to happen a bit too quickly and I even wondered whether the eagle had been shot down or had simply dropped me off (more likely). At the same time I was very much aware that I was standing right on the very edge of a huge fire that filled all of my vision.

Eagle ride to the Himalayas

I was staring so hard at the winged being that even in that ‘state’ I began to meditate upon it, until I was slowly drawn towards it. As I got closer it began to look increasingly bird-like.

Before I actually reached it – while I was a few feet away – it seemed as if I was somehow becoming one with it, or closely attached at least; the only thing in my mind was what was before my eye, which at that point in time was like a bird. A white bird. The only thing in my mind was ‘white’ bird and as I thought of this in my eye was a dove.

At this point in time I realised I was actually thinking I was at one with a white dove and wondered if I was just ego-tripping. I wondered if I should stop, but for no apparent reason a voice told me not to think about that kind of thing.

We were rising upwards vertically – floating rather than flying – and I was conscious only of the being itself and the blue sky peripherally surrounding us. As we rose higher the bird began to change into a swan and other large, white birds, until it was like an eagle in form. Maybe even a Phoenix, I wondered, but I didn’t know if this could be right.

When we finally finished the ascent – I knew it was very, very high up in the sky – the eagle began to fly in a particular direction with me on its back. I kept very close indeed to the bird’s head/shoulders, so that our faces were almost touching.

I had the distinct impression it was very cold indeed and that we were heading to an even colder place. We seemed to fly for quite a long time. I like hot climates and the cold weather bothered me, it seemed uncomfortably cold.

The sight of a huge, white triangular shape made me realise we were flying towards – and would ultimately fly above – snow-capped mountains that I was told were the Himalayas. The flight over the mountains was spectacular. We followed a very narrow ridge for a long way and there was nothing but snow and sky to be seen amongst those razor sharp peaks.

Spectacular Fairy emerges from Rainbow Cocoon

A number of beings rushed over to the edge to pull my unconscious self onto the platform, and proceeded to administer what appeared to be some form of emergency operation.

My self was laid flat on its back – quite lifelessly, it seemed to my mind – as the angel beings, other souls, or whoever they were, ministered to it with lightening speed, bathing it in platinum light and then weaving a rainbow around it like a kind of shroud. Although they were working very quickly and very hard, this did take a certain amount of time.

Amazingly for the ‘I’ that was watching, shortly after the rainbow cocoon was finished, my self – or a being from what used to be what I’d previously seen of my self – was suddenly upright with an extremely energetic, instantaneous-seeming movement, and opened up a gigantic pair of transclucent white wings. In terms of the proportion of wings to body this being resembled a butterfly more than a bird, though it was clearly of human size, comparable to those others present.

The wings were white and looked feathery, the body was very, very slender and kind of golden-brown, with an elfin face that fizzed with energy and was neither smiling nor frowning but looked very intense, as if concentrating. Its hair – the same colour as the body – seemed to crackle with static electricity.

It looked like my self as a butterfly, but not exactly like me, it had narrower features. Energy pulsated through it as it hovered. I naturally thought it was Gabriel, for the simple reason that this was the name I’d just said, though at the same time I acknowledged that in actual appearance it was more like a spectacular fairy than anything else, to my mind at least.

Gabriel saves the burned Soul

I went to bed around midnight and no sooner had I lain down when I realized I was being drawn out through my inner eye, as happened very often during that era, until it was happening at almost all times.

During the initial stage of the journey I was not really conscious of it being either an ascent or a descent, as the world is round, but I later realized it had probably been a descent. Very near the start I seemed to be travelling through a vast tunnel of ‘cloud’-like gaseous material that was not black but was dark – like ink in water – and seemed smoky.

At the end of this very large tunnel was a blazing orange light which looked incredibly fiery, like the sun or a furnace. I let myself be drawn up the tunnel without thinking too much about what was happening, dispassionately, you might say.

I do not know what happened next, for all went blank, but I do know that when I emerged into the next ‘scene’ I was no longer ‘one’, but was split in two. My consciousness and reason – ‘me’, the part with my mind – was in a high up place watching for my ‘other’ (etheric, soul, spirit?) self, although we did not realise this until we actually saw this ‘other’ part.

All around me was very clear, pale blue sky – all was airy and light – and I realized at once we were very high up. Below me was a large platform – basically a flat, white cloud – and I observed ‘my self’ arrive at the base of this platform and cling to it as if for dear life, looking not just exhausted, but on the verge of death.

I must have been given some kind of ‘prompt’ as a thought/word sprang into my head in that instant and I spoke it gleefully, like a pupil who’s cracked the exam, a bit like with ‘Capricorn’:

“Gabriel!”

A split second later, with barely a breath between them, another word was said very quietly, from behind me. This was, ‘Satan’.

The voice which had whispered this last attempted to tell me I’d ‘failed’, that I was lost, but I was not in doubt because it was very plain to see that my first thought had been of ‘Gabriel’, which I reasserted this very firmly. I was not for having my mind poisoned and at that point in time was able to resist this kind of pollution.

Divine Comedy

Because approaching the object of its desires,

our intellect is so deeply absorbed

that memory cannot follow it all the way.

Dante, The Divine Comedy

Ancient Script

The scene changed again and we were in a completely dark chamber. All I was aware of was a kind of book she placed in my hands, but it was not like an ordinary book. I’m not sure what it was made of but it was white and a double ‘page’ and at first it was completely blank.

As I peered at it, somewhat puzzled, writing began to appear, just a few letters, which I could not understand at all. The words just materialized as if they were being written or carved in front of me, from right to left. The only thing I could think was that it was all in triangles, apart from one letter that was comprised of three short diagonal lines in parallel.

I spent a fair bit of time afterward looking up ancient scripts for something that might have matched it, and found a few things that might have fit the bill. I can only really remember two of the letters for sure: The complete triangle and the one with 3 diagonal lines on the left of it, which was like an epsilon.

I felt a bit below par for not understanding and a moment after that the scene changed again. My entire vision was filled with a smooth, grey, soothing and pleasantly curved object. Lifting my head I soon realized I was lying face down staring at a big pebble and, as I got to my feet, it was to find myself on the shore of a very clear, calm, green-grey sea in daytime.

I looked out to sea and was struck with a sense of profound wonder and mystification, because there was nothing but calm sea in front of me, but I felt certain I had just been somewhere beneath the waves.

I was not thinking of Atlantis at this point, I was just wondering where this place had come from or gone to. I wondered how it was that I’d seen the sky so clearly if the place was underwater. I had an impulse to dive back into the water and on impulse started to move forwards, intending to do just that, but then a face suddenly appeared in front of me which made me jump out of my skin.

It was a very friendly, smiling black man with shining eyes and short dark hair, but he made me jump so much I was scared. It was like I’d never seen a black man before! A moment later I felt guilty for being scared and gave him a hug, apologizing quite profusely. I had a kind of feeling he may have rescued me in some way, or found me on the sea shore – chances are it was him that had pulled my head up.

The next moment I was back in my bedroom and shortly afterward I fell asleep.